Raising a Child Who Can Overcome Problems and Setbacks
Updated: Oct 2, 2022
Life is full of problems and setbacks.
As a parent, you need to raise your child to have the ability to overcome.
A resilient child will grow up to be a resilient adult who knows how to recover from even the toughest failures instead of simply wallowing in them.
In this article, I will be sharing tips on how to raise a child who can overcome life's problems and setbacks.
Phrases to avoid if you want to raise a resilient child
The things that you do and say can have a big impact on the values your child develops.
To raise a resilient child, it is important to determine the balance between supporting your child and simply ironing out all of your child’s problems on his behalf.
1. “You are fine.”
This sounds like calm down your child.
Instead, try: “I see that you are upset, and that is okay.”
Inform your child that his big emotions are okay and that he can overcome them.
Give your child tools to self soothe or calm down when he had big emotions.
For example, a colouring book, some Play-Doh, and lotion that smells good.
This helps your child manage and continue healthy coping skills as he grows older.
2. “I will fix it for you.”
Instead, try: “Do you need help figuring this out?”
Allow your child to experience difficult situations will teach him that he can figure his problems out by himself.
There are times when you will have to intervene but find the balance between helping your child and solving his problems for him.
If your child struggles with tying his shoelaces, show him how to do one shoe then encourage him to do the other.
3. “This is too hard for you.”
This can send a message that you think your child is incapable.
Instead, try: “Maybe you can try doing this other thing instead.”
Sometimes your child wants to try doing things that he is not ready for, maybe because he saw you or someone else doing it before.
Focus on directing your child’s attention toward an activity that is more appropriate for him.
With some practice, your child might eventually be able to do that other difficult task.
4. “Be careful.”
This can send your child the message that it is not safe.
Instead, try: Stand close to him.
If you think your child might get hurt while climbing a slide or a ladder while playing, simply try standing close to him if he needs your help.
This will encourage his ability to determine when a situation is unsafe and when it is okay to take a little risk.
5. “Say No or Failure.”
Let your child learn how to handle being told “No” or grow up knowing that it is all about his effort, rather than his outcome,
Rejection or failure is not the end of the road, you are strong enough to handle failing, there are other choices for you to explore.
I hope all these tips will help you to raise your child to overcome life's problems and setbacks.
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